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Five Things I Think I Think About the Miami Dolphins – Week 9
Alright, let's break down this Miami Dolphins situation like we're dissecting a late-night NBA League Pass game you already know the outcome of but watch anyway for the drama. Coming off a shockingly dominant 24-point win over the Atlanta Falcons on just three days' rest, the vibe around the Fins felt like that brief moment when your favorite team hits a half-court buzzer-beater before halftime—everything is possible.Then reality, in the form of Lamar Jackson and the Baltimore Ravens, crashed the party on Thursday Night Football. Jackson's return from injury was the league's equivalent of the main character re-entering the scene; you just knew the script was about to flip.And flip it did, with the Dolphins reverting to their most reliable, and most frustrating, tendencies in a 6-28 loss that felt like watching a highlight reel of the team's worst habits. The defense, which had somehow contained Bijan Robinson a few days prior, decided to take the night off.Baltimore's tight ends—Mark Andrews, Charlie Kolar, and Isaiah Likely—became unguardable icons, collectively racking up 105 yards and three touchdowns, a throwback performance that would make any Dolphins fan from the last decade sigh with a strange mix of nostalgia and despair. Then there was the run defense, which apparently decided that tackling Derrick Henry was merely a suggestion.Henry bulldozed his way to 119 yards, averaging a cool 6. 3 yards per carry, while the rest of the Ravens' backfield chipped in another 31 yards for a cool 150 on the ground.It was a masterclass in regression, a performance so perfectly aligned with the Dolphins' prime-time woes that it felt almost scripted. This team, my friends, has a brand, and that brand is failing when the lights are brightest.With a Monday Night game in Pittsburgh and a Sunday Night game against Cincinnati looming in Weeks 15 and 16, the schedule is practically begging for more of the same soul-crushing performances. Offensively, it was a snooze-fest that would make a 2 a.m. infomercial seem thrilling.Tua Tagovailoa's stat line—25 for 40, 261 yards, zero touchdowns, one interception, two sacks—reads like the ingredients list on a bland protein bar: technically food, but utterly uninspiring. De'Von Achane managed 67 yards on 14 carries, and Jaylen Waddle hauled in 6 catches for 82 yards, but the entire operation felt like going through the motions.Watching the condensed 38-minute replay felt like a chore, a testament to a game where the energy was so low you'd think the players were already thinking about their bye week plans. It’s the kind of performance that makes you wonder if anyone truly cares—the front office, the coaches, the players, even us fans staring at the screen in a daze.Well, almost anyone. Enter Ollie Gordon II, the one glorious spark in this dumpster fire.My man OGII got called for a tripping penalty by a Thursday Night officiating crew that seemed to be making things up as they went along, and on the sideline, running backs coach Eric Studesville lit into him. And Gordon, bless him, lit right back.In the throes of a blowout loss on a night he'd later leave with an injury, he cared enough to show some fire. That’s the kind of passion you can build around, the emotional core this team often lacks.Meanwhile, the pass rush, which was supposed to be this team's identity, has been about as effective as a screen door on a submarine. Bradley Chubb isn't living up to his contract, Jaelan Phillips can't stay healthy, and Chop Robinson isn't getting enough snaps to make an impact.The rumors of Miami shipping one out before the trade deadline feel like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic; this entire unit needs a rethink, a youth movement to shed some of the dead weight and financial anchors holding it down. But just as the despair was reaching peak levels, Dolphins owner Stephen Ross pulled a dramatic, WWE-style move, dropping a 'People's Elbow' on General Manager Chris Grier in what was charitably described as a 'mutual parting of ways.' Let's be real: this was a firing, the kind of move you make when you've hit a ceiling and it's not a championship ceiling. Grier had been with the franchise for over two decades, a notable part of the furniture, but the house never got rebuilt into a contender.The parallels to my other team, Penn State, firing its head coach are stark—both organizations recognized that the current leadership couldn't take them to the promised land. Even if the next GM is a total flop, a listicle-writing fanboy with a questionable media diet, moving on from Grier was the right call.There's no guarantee the next step is the right one, but standing still wasn't an option. So, as we look ahead, the questions pile up like unread notifications. Will Champ Kelly stick around as GM? Will Mike McDaniel be coaching into the 2030s? Will Stephen Ross finally reveal he's a lizard person? Tune in next time for another episode of As The Fins Turn.
#Miami Dolphins
#NFL Week 9
#team performance
#prime time games
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